Lessons Learned While Living

By   Mariamne  Paulus


The Wisdom Teachings through all ages teach that to learn and grow spiritually we must be embodied.  The challenge is to learn to register higher frequencies of energy, to perceive higher wisdom, and then to manifest what you have learned in and through the personality and body. Lately I have been reflecting on things I have learned while living through my body, things I would not have understood if I had learned about them only on the mental level.

The Limitations of the Body

One of the revelations of my spiritual breakthroughs was of the beauty and perfection of the physical body. I learned to love my own body and to receive it as a perfect vehicle for my personal expression. What I didn’t realize at the time was that the body is limited in its capacity to express higher frequency energies because it belongs to the space/time continuum.

I was so full of love after my openings that I wanted to express that love to everyone. Most people were/are receptive to a warm hug, but I learned quickly that not everyone is. I learned to ask, “Do you hug?” or “Would you like a hug?” in order not to invade people’s private space.

That was the first thing I learned about bodies. Bodies can express the lower three chakra energies: sacral, generative and solar plexus, all three of which are personal and magnetic. They cannot, however, convey through physical expression the higher frequency chakras.

Once I had expanded my consciousness into an awareness that we are all one, I felt that I could “make love” with anyone. However, I quickly discovered that sexual engaging is so particular, so specific, that it leads to feelings of attachment on the personal level. Therefore it is not possible to express impersonal or unconditional love through sexual intercourse. To attempt to do so mixes levels of energy frequencies.

This was a hard lesson for me to learn because I was so certain I could express love physically with anyone. I have heard many stories from others about the complicated situations they have gotten into through sexual engaging, and I had a few such experiences of my own.

Because the body is an expression of personal energies even if your heart chakra is open, its sexual expression needs to be restricted to committed relationships in order not to complicate and confuse interpersonal dynamics.

Energy Bonds and Their Expression       

We live in an energy world and we are energetically connected to everyone. What we call attraction to another is actually recognition of the bond that already exists. The conscious recognition of that bond strengthens it; the more active the expression given to the bond, the stronger it becomes.

In friendship, for example, we begin to share activities and conversation. Each interaction strengthens the bond. In families the bonds are formed from infancy and are strengthened through the years by every exchange, even if we think the exchanges are unpleasant. In spiritual communities such as our Love Family or our Energy Odyssey group, shared interactions deepen the connections felt. Perhaps the strongest bonds are between persons who acknowledge them with a commitment. It might be a shared statement of “we will be friends for life,” or “I will always love you,” or “till death do us part.”

Energy bonds exist before conscious interaction on the personal level and they cannot be broken because they are part of the fabric into which we are all woven. But the physical, emotional and mental expressions of those bonds can and do end. This I have learned through living.

Sometimes contact ends because of a change of circumstance: someone moves away, or family and job responsibilities take up too much time and energy. Sometimes persons simply choose to move on to other relationships. Sometimes commitments are broken when they no longer express the truth of the relationship. Sometimes someone physically dies.

What I have learned through living is that the expression of energy bonds changes but the energy bond itself remains intact. This is often experienced when we see an old friend after many years of being out of contact and in just a few moments it feels like we simply picked up where we left off. It is also experienced by people who divorce and find that they still feel strongly connected to the person they divorced. Sometimes people experience the presence of loved ones after they have died.

It is helpful to know about the energy chakras, because it is easy to understand that the lower chakras (physical, sexual, emotional, and mental energies) are time and space bound; their expression changes and even ends. The upper chakras, beginning with the heart chakra, are not bound by time and space and therefore their expression is less limited. Consequently we can reach across time and space with our love, our thoughts, our attention, our intuition and our knowing.

What I have learned is that what is true of the energy world, namely that bonds are eternal, is not true of their outer expression.  I find it easier to let go of the forms of expression having learned this lesson.

Universal and  Personal Love

When OSO and I started our work together, I believed that all people really needed was to know that they are loved unconditionally. I quickly learned that that is not true. People have needs on all levels: physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. Unconditional love creates a safe environment in which people can explore those needs and perhaps get them met. But unconditional love will not fill needs on other levels.

In fact, unconditional love is so impersonal that some people are offended by it. That energy can feel aloof, removed, uncaring, distant, unfeeling, etc. This was a shock to me and I had to learn to direct energy into and through all chakras in order to touch people where they needed to be touched.

Teaching and Learning          

There is no such thing as a good teacher without a good learner. I first learned this from my mother.  I thanked her for all she taught me as I was growing up. She responded, “Well, you took what I taught you and used it. I offered the same to each of my children, but not all of them were able to take it in.”

I have learned through living that this is true in any relationship where one “teaches” and the other “learns.” The one teaching needs to be perceptive and develop skills to communicate what she wants to pass along. The one learning needs to be receptive, actively take in what is offered, and put it into practice.  It takes two. No one can be a good teacher without a good learner to receive what is offered.

Families and Spirituality

Families are the major context for the formation of our personalities, so they are very important in our lives. However, I have learned that birth families are not usually good containers for spiritual development. That is because the individuals that make up a nuclear family come together for learning on the personal level. Usually their spiritual paths are quite disparate and if individuals choose to follow their own inner guidance, family members may not understand or support them. One can come into a loving family and still feel spiritually lost in their midst.

It is usually necessary to find a spiritual family with whom you do not necessarily share your personal life. This may seem strange, but again, knowing about the energy centers helps to make sense of such things.